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~uball 1
|
<WingedPuma> last time I trusted a clanner, I woke up in bed with uziel and a half shaven goat
|
|
~uball 2
|
<Uziel> ~oddball latest
<Uziel> ffs matt I fucking hate you at times
<Uziel> I was asking him a favour but nooooo
<Uziel> sigh
<Uziel> and im getting no dinner tonight. grr.
<StCol_Egwene_Grimaldi[KG-ADC]> go to MB's house for dinner :P
<Uziel> too far away
<Uziel> plus laura would be too scared of me
|
|
~uball 3
|
<Uziel> ....and once again I demonstrate my talent for killing conversations
<Wayward_Son> the ladies must love that
<Uziel> oh yeah WWS,they love it. means we can skip the foreplay
<Wayward_Son> and go straight to the not returning your phone calls
|
|
~uball 4
|
<Uziel> STD = Normal then
|
|
~uball 5
|
<Uziel> ya know
<Uziel> it says it all when on my clan noticeboard someones put a message for me saying "STOP BREAKING COMBAT"
|
|
~uball 6
|
<mattbot3> | ~uball 5 | <Uziel> ya know
<mattbot3> | ~uball 5 | <Uziel> it says it all when on my clan noticeboard someones put am essage for me saying "STOP BREAKING COMBAT"
<John_Church> let me see who is to blame
<John_Church> wow
<John_Church> lol
<John_Church> it actually was uziel
|
|
~uball 7
|
<Uziel> I have more than 2 iballs :) I am superior to the common human
|
|
~uball 8
|
<Uziel> I DEMAND MY OWN BALLS!
|
|
~uball 9
|
<Ben_Holland> Uziel you failed. I figured with you back you'd have at least 1 new iball before I got back from work
|
|
~uball 10
|
<Uziel> I think I have surpassed peel in stupidity. I should kill myself now.
|
|
~uball 11
|
<Uziel> looking forward to doing my acting as a pirate next month in the house plays
<Uziel> I have a small role
<Uziel> sword fighting on stage...
<Uziel> singing...
<Uziel> confessing my love for an armadillo...
|
|
~uball 12
|
<Uziel> im breeding with myself
<Uziel> and I haven't impregnated my right hand
|
|
~uball 13
|
* John_Church-Work sets mode: +ikeo your head!*@* StCol_Jacob_Ward[CC]
<John_Church-Work> err
<John_Church-Work> I like where you head is at
<mattbuck> weirdest mode change EVER
<John_Church-Work> I totally screwed up the channel didn't i
<Osiris> John is the uziel of #invasion
|
|
~uball 14
|
<mattbuck> uziel, i wish you would evaporate
<Uziel> I wish you would sublime
<mattbuck> touché
<Uziel> unfortunately, if you were rendered into a gaseous state, it might increase global warming or something....then greenpeace would complain....and then it would just get out of hand
<mattbuck> oh
<saKhan_Poc_Kerensky{CW}> but uzi if any fighting started because of it im sure you would break it fairly quickly
<saKhan_Poc_Kerensky{CW}> so no major problems to come out of it
<Uziel> damn right poc
<Uziel> id crash all the software on their fighter jets and tanks and things, and jam all their assault rifles
|
|
~uball 15
|
<Uziel> brb... Ih ave a craving for ice cream
<Snow_Fox> uziel
<Snow_Fox> your not preggers are ya?
<Uziel> i hope not
<Uziel> WingedPuma's too cheap to pay child support if i am
|
|
~uball 16
|
* Uziel is now known as Mr_Chav
|
|
~uball 17
|
<Uziel> http://mattbuck.irongalaxy.com/mattbot/iball.html
<Jenny> already looked
<Uziel> ...you have it on favourites?
<Jenny> it helps me keep tabs on your dwindling supply of sanity
|
|
~uball 18
|
<Uziel> fudge
<Uziel> might not have been the best idea to link Jenny to oddball
<mattbuck> just because the first few are related to male genitalia bigger than yours...
<Uziel> ....
<Uziel> matt,if you want photographic evidence....actually...no...not even im that vain
<Uziel> stupid, yes
<Uziel> vain, no
|
|
~uball 19
|
<SupermarketZombies> uzi we need some iballs
<Uziel> Meh, Matt seems to have lost interest in them
<Uziel> No matter what i say, he refuses to ball me
* Uziel slaps mattbuck around a bit with a large trout
<Uziel> freaking killjoy
<Uziel> jenny is in spain for 10 days
<Uziel> she expects balls when she gets back!
|
|
~uball 20
|
<Uziel> I am a sexy pirate
|
|
~uball 21
|
<Uziel> matt you gimp. You haven't properly accorded me my own annals of stupidity
<Uziel> and just an FYI, that says Annals, NOT anals
|
|
~uball 22
|
<Uziel> ~uball 21
<Uziel> >.<
<Uziel> now I look like a gay. thx.
|
|
~uball 23
|
<mattbuck> ok, who wants to see uziel dressed as a pirate?
<Snow_Fox> is it his big romance scene with the armidillo?
<Uziel> damn right snow fox
<Uziel> that armadillo was TOTALLY into me
<Uziel> ....crap
<Uziel> NOT IN THAT WAY
|
|
~uball 24
|
<Uziel> a normal naked guy I can handle
<Uziel> but not peel
<Uziel> and ohgod that sounds wrong
<Uziel> I dont handle naked guys
<Uziel> not in that way.
<Uziel> </gay>
<Uziel> >.< from now on when matts here im not gonna speak. Lest I seem even stupider than I actually am
|
|
~uball 25
|
<Uziel> sigh, lets assess the damage
<Uziel> ~iball uziel
<Uziel> ~iball 82
<Uziel> ~iball 83
<Uziel> I scored a hattrick, woot
<mattbuck> nice
<mattbuck> i'll just keep the pball and iball text files open
<mattbuck> or maybe i should just make mattbot log directly to iball
<Uziel> que?
<Uziel> you expecting that much mass stupidity out of me?
<mattbuck> yes
|
|
~uball 26
|
<Uziel> ~iball uziel
<Uziel> .....oh god, not another
|
|
~uball 27
|
<Uziel> i'm learning
<Uziel> you see
<Uziel> now I can say stupid stuff
<Uziel> and realise ive said stupid stuff
<Uziel> ive just gotta make the leap to not saying it in the first place
|
|
~uball 28
|
<Uziel> I found out one of the 14yo fem cadets madly fancies me
<Uziel> and im freaking 17
<Uziel> IM TURNING INTO PEEL! AAAHHHH
|
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~uball 29
|
<Uziel> my gf thinks its cute that this 14 yo fancies me
<Uziel> why oh why does the universe hate me?
|
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~uball 30
|
<StCpt_Wraith{CW}> Uziel show pics of your girl
<Uziel> no wraith
<Uziel> I refuse to make a deposit into your wank bank
|
|
~uball 31
|
<Uziel> matt
<Uziel> have you told mattbot to tell me im turning into peel everytime i ask it something?
|
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~uball 32
|
<Uziel> uh oh
<Uziel> I just did a dumb dumb
|
|
~uball 33
|
* Uziel was kicked by Tzu_theory (/me kicks Uzi from the room)
* Uziel (generalhag@client-82-12-253-246.brnt.adsl.virgin.net) has joined #invasionchat
* X3 sets mode: +v Uziel
<Uziel> why the hell does everyone have higer access?
<Uziel> im the life and soul of this room!
<Uziel> im like
<Uziel> lovable
<mattbuck> because i'm not stupid enough to let you have ops
|
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~uball 34
|
<Uziel> if they ever make stupidity a crime im SO going to prison
|
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~uball 35
|
<Uziel> ReLoad, if I bork anything, dont delete me? please?
|
|
~uball 36
|
<Uziel> I still cant believe you never got my best moment EVER on the oddball/iball
<Uziel> was a few months ago
<Uziel> chet came into chat, and someone called him chetterbear
<Uziel> SnowFox said not to call him chetterbear
<Uziel> and I, for reasons that I still dont comprehend, said I call him chetterbear, mainly because he enjoys a good stuffing
<Uziel> as in, you know, teddybear stuffing....and yeah...
<Uziel> I like to think of that comment as the beginning of my spiral into insanity
|
|
~uball 37
|
<Uziel> goddamnit
<Uziel> I cant even act like an idiot without making an idiot of myself
|
|
~uball 38
|
<Uziel> did I tell you all about my mechanics homework?
<Uziel> I subbed in the wrong number and got a divide by zero error
<Uziel> so I circled it, drew an unhappy face, wrote "oh bugger" then drew the earth exploding
<Uziel> ...i got marked down for it :(
|
|
~uball 39
|
<Uziel> I've not done anything stupid since thursday, I feel rather proud
|
|
~uball 40
|
<Uziel> ~iball latest
<mattbot3> | ~iball 102 | <Uziel> I've not done anything stupid since thursday, I feel rather proud
<Uziel> aww crap
<Uziel> DAMN YOU MATT
<Uziel> I wanted my 72 hours of no iballs
|
|
~uball 41
|
* WingedPuma kicks uziel
<Uziel> Puma! :D
<WingedPuma> we get up to NOTHING
<Uziel> I meant in terms of our weird discussions
<Uziel> matt just took it outta context by implying you take it up the chuffer
<StCmdr_Thunderlyon_FetladralCW> lol
<WingedPuma> Why me? You're the one always getting done up the chuffer with the bugs
<Uziel> I believe my first words last night upon finding out were in fact along the line of "we just got screwed in the ass without lube"
<Uziel> to which one of my warrirs replied "But I dont see chet!"
<WingedPuma> o.O
|
|
~uball 42
|
<Uziel> ...im scared to check the iball
<Uziel> my GF has told me if I get more than 1/3 of the quotes on there, shes sending me to a psychiatrist
<StCpt_Wraith{CW}> why are you telling your girl about battletech
<Uziel> im not
<Uziel> I just told her "Hey, you might find some of this funny"
<Uziel> then she realised "Hey, arent you Uziel Huntsig?" "Umm...maybe? Why?" "I knew you were perverted and weird, but thats just sick"
|
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~uball 43
|
<mattbuck> Laura says:
<mattbuck> oh. have you oddballed uziels quote?
<Uziel> uh oh
<Uziel> my GF talks about you, and your GF talks about me. this is getting weird.
<Uziel> tell Laura I said hi
|
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~uball 44
|
<Uziel> matt, have I been balled recently?
|
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~uball 45
|
<WingedPuma> ~iball Puma
<mattbot3> WingedPuma: Your search (Puma) returned 19 results (17.6% of total): 24 25 40 53 54 55 56 58 59 60 61 64 69 70 71 76 78 82 104
<WingedPuma> Twice as intelligent as Uziel... Im somewhat pleased.
<[LotF]Plue[Press]> Or only half as quotable?
<Uziel> Half as amusing, Puma
<[LotF]Plue[Press]> hmm, you share 104
<[LotF]Plue[Press]> didn't know two people could share balls
<{NC}Invader> lol
<WingedPuma> Siamese twins ;)
<Uziel> Puma loves me so much we just had to find a way
|
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~uball 46
|
<WingedPuma> So mattbuck, when did you update mattbot?
<mattbuck> which time Puma?
<WingedPuma> The most recent which shows the percentages of quotes for a particular person.
<mattbuck> last week, when uziel mentioned that his gf will make him see a shrink if he gets 1/3 of all iballs
<Uziel> yar
<Uziel> else I will have more balls than she can handle
<Uziel> poor joke but meh
<Uziel> I figured id make it before one of you twisted it into something involving me, Puma, and pink furry handcuffs
|
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~uball 47
|
<Uziel> mattt...stop broadcasting my stupidity to jenny :(
|
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~uball 48
|
* Uziel makes note
<Uziel> general rule of thumb
<Uziel> do not tell your girlfriend you can see tubgirl without being affected, under the assumption she actually knows what tubgirl is
|
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~uball 49
|
<Uziel> ~iball uziel
<mattbot3> Uziel: Uziel has been in 38 ~iballs (33.333% of total).
BRING HIM IN NOW JENNY! 10 16 19 22 26 37 38 39 41 43 46 47 49 57 77 81 82 83 84 85 87 88 89 90 91 93 95 96 98 100 102 103 104 108 109 110 111 114
<Uziel> OH GOD
<StCol_Egwene_Grimaldi[KG-ADC]> lolol
<StCol_Egwene_Grimaldi[KG-ADC]> uzi you would be better off not talking :P
<Uziel> ...I never thought it would happen
<Uziel> Eggy, I try but they trick me :(
<StCol_Egwene_Grimaldi[KG-ADC]> no you do not
<Uziel> I did.
<Uziel> I said I woudlnt speak
<Uziel> then 5 minutes later I forget :(
* Uziel is now known as Uzi|AFK|Psychiatrist
<Uzi|AFK|Psychiatrist> :'(
|
|
~uball 50
|
<Uziel> fortunately im off now
<Uziel> so, no more comedy for you all im afraid
<Uziel> unfortunately, one of my friends is now reading iball
<Uziel> my school repuation = ruined
|
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~uball 51
|
<Uziel> ~iball uziel
<Uziel> 48 hours and no balls
<Uziel> life is good
|
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~uball 52
|
<Uziel> ~iball uziel
<Uziel> I really really despise you with a passion matt :(
<mattbuck> what
<Uziel> 34.146
<Uziel> if I get to 50, I should probably be institutionalised....
<Uziel> and NO MATT that is NOT a goal for you
|
|
~uball 53
|
<Uziel> ~iball url
<Uziel> jen needs her weekly balling
|
|
~uball 54
|
<Ambient> What can I say, what with Uziel as a leader, I almost feel obligated to try and break things.
|
|
~uball 55
|
<Malachi> guys i beat you all
<Malachi> i coded Uziel
<saKhan|Carin_Tseng[CGB]> ... That explains the borkiness.
<Malachi> he still has a few "features" to work out tho :/
<Malachi> the trouble is that it was designed to find bugs in reloads code n fix them
<Malachi> instead it finds them, disregards them entirely and breaks something that was working fine
|
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~uball 56
|
<Uziel> Btw, random fact
<Uziel> On another game, I had the nickname of "Sir UzDick"
<Uziel> and ya know arbiter in CGB? He was called "Lord Arsebooble, fondler of all things droopy"
|
|
~uball 57
|
<SCpt_Murphy_Kabrinksi{CGB}> update not loaded yet or something?
<saKhan|Carin_Tseng[CGB]> Reload borked the marketplace somehow, he's fixing it.
<mattbuck> more proof that reload is uziel riding on a kangaroo
|
|
~uball 58
|
* Hawk-Eye (Hawk-Eye@204.16.145.68) has joined #invasion3042
<Hawk-Eye> heya
<mattbuck> bad time to come in Hawk-Eye
<Hawk-Eye> why?
<mattbuck> we're just talking about sharing uziel's "gf"
<Uziel> I have marketing rights of her
<Hawk-Eye> that's not too bad, i though it was another group cavity search again
<Uziel> you gotta pay me to lease her for a while
<Uziel> hawk-eye, I dont wanna KNOW what you get up to with chet
<Hawk-Eye> can we pay in icash?
<Uziel> sure
<Uziel> 50mil for IRC sex
<Uziel> 100mil for phone sex
<Uziel> 2billion gets you the real thing
<WingedPuma{KH}> REALLY?
<WingedPuma{KH}> I have 2.3b hehe
<Uziel> please god matt dont iball this
|
|
~uball 59
|
<Uziel> ambient says I have a weird accent
<Uziel> carin says I have a weird accent
<Uziel> Ben Holland said I had a weird one too.
<Uziel> so today i say to carin, before wep lay with martoq boques on COD4, "reckon he'll comment on the accent?"
<Uziel> to which Carin says "its not my fault you sound like a hobbit"
<mattbuck> oh mr frodo
<mattbuck> FUCKS SAKE SAM KISS HIM ALREADY. god I hate hobbits
<Uziel> Sam was blatantly gay, and his missus was minging. it was just cover so he could go and take Mr Frodo from behind
<Uziel> "Oh Mr Frodo...the one ring isnt the only ring of yours im interested in...."
|
|
~uball 60
|
<Uziel> i gotta the Canaris seal of approval for Jen. Life is good.
<mattbuck> cool. why and how
<Canaris> he sent me the naked pics
<mattbuck> now i know that's false
<Canaris> he didnt take em, he just got her to jump on the messenger and set up the webcam. the Patriotic Duty speech did the rest
<Uziel> ya, building that alliance between britain and the US
<Canaris> plus im sure the roofies peel slipped her helped. i mean, the asprin
<Uziel> shhhhh, canaris, dont tell him everything, he might feel left out. *then* we'd have to give him a copy of the video
<Canaris> all he has to do is check YouTube. I gotta entertain my unit somehow :P
<Uziel> hell ya, hehe
<Canaris> i mean hell, at least she's double the age of the local porn stars
|
|
~uball 61
|
*** Quote removed by request ***
*** Don't worry, it was Uziel being stupid ***
*** Just like usual ***
|
|
~uball 62
|
<Uziel> ahem
<Uziel> EVERYONE TYPE /CLEAR
<Uziel> ok actually seriously if you iball that Jen WILL murder me. so dont.
|
|
~uball 63
|
<Uziel> MATT YOU FUCKING CUNT
<Uziel> JENNY READ THE IBALL
<Uziel> BASTARD
<Uziel> I FUCKING HATE YOU MATT
<Uziel> YOU ASSHAT
<Uziel> BASTARD
<Uziel> ASSHOLE
<Uziel> ASSHAT
<Uziel> GRRR
<Uziel> I HATE YOU
<Uziel> Matt
<Uziel> you are
<Uziel> actually
<Uziel> quite seriously
<Uziel> GOING TO FUCKING DIE
|
|
~uball 64
|
<Uziel> It's not rape if you say surprise
<Uziel> And no, that isn't how i met my GF
|
|
~uball 65
|
<Uziel> dont iball or oddball anything involving me, jen, and the bedroom
<Uziel> she'll think im even more perverted than I actually am
<SupermarketZombies> I'm still saving up for the 2 bill
|
|
~uball 66
|
<Uziel> hey Puma
<WingedPuma{KH}> allo C4 & sammy short skin
<{FWL}c4bombexperton> how are you today Puma?
<WingedPuma{KH}> great - I might have a job :D
<WingedPuma{KH}> only as a kitchen porter but money's money.
<{FWL}c4bombexperton> nice
<{FWL}c4bombexperton> im trying to get a job working in a computer lab sitting around making sure nobdy breaks stuff
<{FWL}c4bombexperton> just keep uzi out and im golden
|
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~uball 67
|
<Hoppy> uzi u're cute ;-) wanna come over later?
<Uziel> sure hops
<Uziel> you pay for the plane ticket though
<Hoppy> >.<
<Hoppy> you're buying dinner then
<Uziel> deal
<Uziel> do you want to be tied up first or should I?
<LyCom_Fleet_Admiral_Plue> what do you think Jen will say? :P
<Uziel> I dunno, Jen probably wouldnt care
<Hoppy> jen doesnt say anything besides my name anyway
<Uziel> ya, shes all like "oh curty! Curty! Do me curty!"
|
|
~uball 68
|
<Khan_Ben_Holland> ~iball uziel
<mattbot3> Khan_Ben_Holland: Uziel has been in 58 ~iballs (36.025% of total).
BRING HIM IN NOW JENNY! 10 16 19 22 26 37 38 39 41 43 46 47 49 57 77 81 82 83 84 85 87 88 89 90 91 93 95 96 98 100 102 103 104 108 109 110 111 114 115 116 120 123 124 125 126 127 128 130 131 132 133 139 140 142 144 147 156 161
<Khan_Ben_Holland> bah
<Khan_Ben_Holland> Uziel isn't making progress to 50%
<Uziel> i keep fluctuating between 35 and 37
<Uziel> I fear I have borked my own progress
|
|
~uball 69
|
<Uziel> im at 10.9% of all balls
<Uziel> I am officially a ballwhore
<shas> uzi loves the balls
<Uziel> actually my GF does
<Uziel> she finds it terribly amusing that she can see my online antics summarised in one clean form
<Uziel> She actually said to me once "You haven't had an iball in a week, I'm proud of you"
<Uziel> I then directed her to three new oddballs. I then got viciously prodded.
<Uziel> And she has BONY FINGERS.
|
|
~uball 70
|
<Uziel> Kitties are made of leet and win
<Uziel> Uzi's are made of hax and bork
|
|
~uball 71
|
<SoBatinni> who broke invasion?
<Toontje_Liao> Uziel
<Toontje_Liao> Always Uziel
|
|
~uball 72
|
<Uziel> some jerk off is running about in the big ass oil refinery next to my house with a backpack. entire place has been shutdown for 3 hours now, and they still havent found the bugger
<Uziel> the traffic has been locked down. nothing in or out, and theyre shutting down anything that could be easily made to go kaboom
<Toontje_Liao> well, it's a refinery, refineries go boom without a terorist from time to time as well
<Uziel> true
<Ben_Holland> they make big orange flashes and loud noises
<mattbuck> so uzi... goodbye. it's been nice knowing you
<Uziel> ty matt. you git.
<mattbuck> in case you die, I don't want you to think I actually dislike you
<Uziel> matt, if I should die, then auction jenny, and donate all the proceeds to my clan
|
|
~uball 73
|
<Uziel> woot, I won the geek competition
<Uziel> ....which in hindsight isnt something I should be proud of
|
|
~uball 74
|
<Uziel> Aww Nuts. Im seeing Jen tomorrow, and she has a sick sense of humour.
<Uziel> This could be a potentially insane april fools day.
<Fox-BuyingECM-PM> were gonna get more iballs and odballs arnt we
<Uziel> God I hope not.
<mattbuck> "hey sam, you're getting sex"
<mattbuck> APRIL FOOLS!
|
|
~uball 75
|
<Uziel> ~iball latest
<Uziel> ~oddball latest
<Uziel> ~nevball latest
<Uziel> ~pball latest
<Uziel> oh god
<Uziel> im at 4 out of 4
|
|
~uball 76
|
<Uziel> I'll give anyone who isnt thunder some naked pictures of peel in exchange for a Kodiak
<Uziel> and before you ask why I have them, matt send me them on facebook
<Uziel> wait, sorry, my bad, it was dodgy pics of peel and naked pics of malachi
<Uziel> my mistake.
<LyCom_Fleet_Admiral_Plue> You're really working too hard to try and regain your lost balls
|
|
~uball 77
|
<Uziel> ~oddball latest
<Uziel> matt, do you have nothing better to do?
<mattbuck> oh, so you whine when i'm NOT adding you to iball, and you whine when I DO add you to iball
<mattbuck> honestly, it's like you still play nev
<Uziel> well matt, im just worried that Jen might ACTUALLY, FINALLY bother to book that pschiatrist appointment
|
|
~uball 78
|
<Uziel> wow I have basically no STDs
|
|
~uball 79
|
<Uziel> Mmmm
<Uziel> Necrophilia...
|
|
~uball 80
|
<Uziel> Dont make jokes about me drilling my platoon.
|
|
~uball 81
|
<Uziel> ahh Zakarius...how I miss you, my sarcastic muffin of love
|
|
~uball 82
|
<Uziel> I feel like a dutch hooker <_<
|
|
~uball 83
|
* Uziel is now known as Darth_Borker
|
|
~uball 84
|
<Uziel> The image of peel in a gimp suit is etched into my memory forever
|
|
~uball 85
|
<John_Church> no Uziel makes church sad in his sexy state
|
|
~uball 86
|
<mattbuck> so how come no one's killed uziel yet?
<Khan_Uziel_Huntsig{CGB}> because im that damned sexy
* Khan_Uziel_Huntsig{CGB} was kicked by John Church (damn sexy can only apply to Church)
<mattbuck> uziel is oh f*** i just shat myself sexy
|
|
~uball 87
|
<ReLoad> well i think i nailed the culprit on the raids ending early at least
<StCol_Ben_Holland[CC]> Is it user error Reload?
<StCol_Ben_Holland[CC]> Can I laugh at Canny for incompetence?
<ReLoad> sadly no
<ReLoad> its uziels fault.
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~uball 88
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<Uziel> I'm barred from the halls of sanity.
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~uball 89
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<Hellspwan> Uzi.. get a real knife... Ka-Bar
<WingedPuma> he's arabic. He already owns a scimitar
<Uziel> Im not arabic, im freaking half persian you twat
<Cromy> his language implies british hertiage as well
<Uziel> Cromy : Dad's Kashmiri, Mum's English
<Uziel> I'm english with a slight persian twist
<Uziel> Jim just likes to pretend I'm a camel jockey
<Mordur> arent u?
<WingedPuma> Sam, you're a cultural bukkake
<Uziel> Yep, my genes are one giant gangbang
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~uball 90
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<Uziel> You know how I've long been of the opinion that people from Dorset are a little bit special?
<Uziel> I set my facebook status to me being "really, really, Really bored"
<Uziel> and my mate from Dorset tells me to "rape a penguin, that'll unbored you"
<Uziel> told him there's no penguins nearby. "well do you have any cuddly toys, ones you love and cherish most?"
<Snow_Fox> o.o
<Uziel> and only NOW does he come out with an intelligent suggestion, like read a book
<Uziel> damned weird dorset people
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~uball 91
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* Khan_Uziel_Huntsig{BA} is a trained whore
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~uball 92
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<InvGuest> sam you slag
<Uziel> so's your mother jim
<InvGuest> at least she looks good in a schoolgirl outfit
<John_Church> Uziel == sam?
<SupermarketZombies{MH}> yes. puro/invguest = james/jim/jimbo
* InvGuest is now known as WingedPuma
<Church_Work> sam + jim == ??
<WingedPuma> love
<Uziel> no, = fight
<Uziel> sam + jim + alcohol = love
<John_Church> sam + jim + alcohol == anal surgery
<WingedPuma> can I make a slight correction to that calculation
<WingedPuma> sam + jim + alchol x goat = love
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~uball 93
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<saKhan_Ben_AFKland> ~uball 90
<Dee> I just think he's friends with stupid people
<Dee> although it could be in the water
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~uball 94
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<mattbuck> happy new year
<mattbuck> may it suck that slight bit less than the last one
<Seras> lol
<Uziel> I dunno,wasn't much sucking for me in2008
<Uziel> So more would be greatly appreciated.
<Uziel> And that can be spun both ways, oh feck.
<Uziel> Great. we're....20 minutes into 2009 ,and I've already said something frigging retarded.
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~uball 95
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<Ambient> Joy, soon to occur uball material, for matt and Uzi are both apparantly typing.
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~uball 96
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<Snow_Fox> but imagine yourself being ontop of a cow trying desperatly to roll in the grass
<Malachi> thats what uziel has to do to stay on his gf
* Snow_Fox as bork as my witness ill not go there
<Uziel> wrong extreme dude, my last GF was a stick insect
<Snow_Fox> so.... your saying youve got a bug fetish?
<Snow_Fox> explains the borkage
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~uball 97
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<Uziel> I just dont use STDs
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~uball 98
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<Uziel> i am homosexual
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~uball 99
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<Uziel> You lot have missed some epic bork events btw.
<Uziel> I have done 8 physics labs.
<Uziel> In 5, the equipment has conked out on me.
<Uziel> The other 3 didn't use electronics.
<Uziel> We had an L118 artillery piece with a computerised fire control system.
<Uziel> Yeah, broke everytime I tried to use it when training.
<Uziel> What else...oh...borked an xbox....urr....borked a watch...
<Uziel> borked a phone....
<Uziel> nearly borked another....
<Uziel> All this since the end of january or so, too.
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~uball 100
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<Uziel> The crappy changes to facebook that people keep moaning about? That's me borking the code to my own ends. Trying to instigate the social collapse of all teenagers and adolescents.
<TC_Jakal> oh no the angst will make them burst
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~uball 101
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<John_Church> (11:53:03) sakhan_CSR: AI is down
<John_Church> ugh, PM me so I notice these things
<John_Church> everyone always thinks someone else did it
<Khan_Murphy{CGB}_recruiting> it was my ex
<Khan_Murphy{CGB}_recruiting> she breaks everything
<Pluesomnia> Uziel?
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~uball 102
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* InvGuest (InvGuest@94-193-200-63.zone7.bethere.co.uk) has joined #invasion3042
<InvGuest> s'up slags
<InvGuest> God almighty, who let Hoppy in here?
<InvGuest> and more importantly, why have I ALREADY broken part of the chat interface so I can't change my name?
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~uball 103
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<Darth_Borker> I may have to stop in here every couple of weeks to give you all my characteristic levels of unsolicited abuse
<Darth_Borker> And pray to god that Matt isn't around to credit me with further balls
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~uball 104
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<SnowFox> huh
<SnowFox> I seem to have randomly generated 1 point of heat
<Darth_Borker> That was me
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~uball 105
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<Darth_Borker> Mmm...heavy metal teabagging
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~uball 106
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<mattbuck[NevWinner]> you just can't help yourself, can you
<Darth_Borker> Not in the slightest. But why would I want to?
<LyCom_FleetAdmiral_Plue[Aesir]> Call charter, they can help
<SnowFox> Plue, they have Anti-Uzi snipers
<Darth_Borker> Anti me snipers? Pah. I'll use the force and jam their rifles, I'm sure we've been over this before
<LyCom_FleetAdmiral_Plue[Aesir]> Ah, but will the force bork before you can do that?
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~uball 107
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<Darth_Borker> You see I like to think it my inane banter and general lack of mental clarity that kept people entertained on IRC
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~uball 108
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* LyCom_FleetAdmiral_Plue[Aesir] kicks Uziel
<Darth_Borker> Hai!
<LyCom_FleetAdmiral_Plue[Aesir]> I blame you
<Darth_Borker> <3
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~uball 109
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<MJ> good to see everyones missed him...question is though which aspect of the game as stopped working
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~uball 110
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<Darth_Borker> I haven't broken anything yet
<Darth_Borker> Honestly
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